Monday, November 27, 2006


Manifesto of Fame

As promised, my Manifesto of Fame:

(Because fame is overrated)

  1. Humans love a pecking order. Someone’s got to be at the top. Why not you?
  1. Some people don’t want to be famous. They’re perfectly happy to run the puppet show from behind the scenes.
  1. There are many levels of fame. Your level of fame is directly proportional to the number of people who talk about you behind your back.
  1. There’s fame and there’s infamy. Would you rather be beloved or reviled? Your choice.
  1. Fame is nothing. Anyone can become famous. Becoming a legend or a myth, now that’s where it’s at. If you’re striving for legend status, or the even more lofty mythdom, be prepared to do something spectacular, like walking on water, but not the frozen kind. That’s not spectacular. That’s just ice fishing.
  1. Famous people are not exempt from their humanity. They still shit behind their shoes, unless their feet have been amputated.
  1. The famous can (and do) go from being beloved to being reviled as a result of their humanity.
  1. If you achieve fame, you will be scrutinized, so don’t whine when people use you as a lightning rod.
  1. Fame is a social phenomenon gained when others grant it to you. Don’t disrespect those who gave you your fame.
  1. Being famous doesn’t mean abdicating your soul to your fans. Set boundaries.
  1. If you allow your fame to increase your hat size, you’ll never find a hat that fits.
  1. Don’t come to expect the perks of fame. Too much ass kissing will only lead to a chapped backside.
  1. It’s not all about you, no matter how famous you get.
  1. Use your fame to do some good in the world, but remain humble while on the bully pulpit.
  1. Enjoy it while you’ve got it. Humans love a pecking order, with the operative word being “pecking.”

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